Fight or flight response.

First date, first date!  Holy shit, it’s a date!  A real date and not a “hey is this a date?” moment. 

So, it’s not with Eric.  On a whim (a very late night whim), I responded to a craigslist ad.  He’s a real guy with a job and hobbies and a good heart.  He’s a nurse in a psych ward.  I know, I know.  It takes crazy to attract crazy.  But still, he’s totally normal.  And real.

We’ve been IMing all week (thus the lack of posts…sorry) and tonight I finally gave up my phone number.  He called within seconds.  And asked me out.  For Wednesday supper. 

I’m scared.  And excited.  And out of xanax so I’m on my own for this one.  Is this right?  Will I relax enough to have fun?  I mean, I know that I will get food on my shirt no matter what so that’s not the issue.

Is this right?  Is it okay?  I mean, I know it’s okay but am I ready?  Am I really okay with this?

Shit.  Too bad that’s my natural reaction to stress.  Shit.

His name is Charley.  He looks like a farmboy.  He’s my age and has never been married, no kids although he has a niece that he has helped to raise and is still a huge part of her life (she’s 12). 

What am I doing?  It’s just a date.  One date.  Just like one email response.  One IM.  One phone call.  And here we are.


One thought on “Fight or flight response.

  1. You’ll be fine! Keep your drink covered. It is totally a different time out there. I treated my staff to beer Friday – one got up to go to the bathroom and started to take her beer with her. Not only that but her hand was covering it. She said no matter how drunk she gets she always covers her beer.
    I can’t believe you will be able to miss American Idol. I just couldn’t do it!

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